Monday, January 12, 2009

OMG, we're not bff anymore?

Sorry, it's been awhile. I've been dealing with weddings galore, holidays, and of course, tool boxes so big my arms hurt from trying to lug them around in my mind.

I borrowed this title from an article I saw in the Wall Street Journal. It was about the art of "unfriending" on facebook, myspace, and other social networking sites. Now, this definitely caught my attention because I love deleting friends on facebook. it's not meant to be mean or callous or cause hurt feelings. it's simply because i am friends with a lot of people that i do not talk to regularly. so why should they be privy to all aspects of my life? i mean, i guess i shouldn't enable all aspects of my life to be open to the public domain but whatever. i'm a double standard in the best form possible.

so, i log on to facebook in an attempt to delete a particular person...we'll call him boat boy. and lo and behold, i find he is no longer on my friends list. wtf...i know he didn't delete me! i know HE did not delete ME! after i got over my initial shock that someone actually had the nerve to delete me, i decided it was definitely time to blog about him.

i'm involved with a local young professionals organization and we had a party aboard a yacht; a booze cruise if you will. boat boy was a boat hand for the evening; the hired help if you will. but he was hot hired help. all the girls are flirting with him but i wasn't worried. at the end of the night, being in no shape to drive my car to the after party, he offered to drive it for me. i obliged and off we went. we showed up late to the after party - i mean, since he was hired help and all, he had to help clean the boat while i sat in the car and wondered what in the world i had gotten myself into. at the after party, we dance, we hold hands, we kanoodle as people in bars often do on or around a pool table. when the night was over, we both realized how hungry we were, so we drove to a local hot dog stand, got some dogs, and took them back to my condo. we stayed up ALL night talking about life, love and everything along the way. He confided that he took his job in NC (at the time of our meeting, he'd been in the city for about 2 months) because he had prayed about it and God had really laid it on his heart to be here. I don't care what your religious affiliation is: nothing is sexier than a hot man talking about God, even if he does have hot dog breath and a mustard stain on his shirt. He got my number, manages to get back home, and proceeds to text message me about hanging out again soon.

unfortunately, the story doesn't end there. he and i get into somewhat of a text messaging argument over a girl we'll call Susan. i have a friend named susan, whom he had met at the after party that night, and he was telling me he really liked susan. they were not and are not one in the same and i most definitely put my foot in my own mouth that night. i accused him of being a player and going behind my back to get to know my friend susan while leading me on. i was especially angry with him because i honestly thought i had found a real winner who prayed about life decisions and really was an upstanding Christian man. boy was I WRONG. after these texts, i decided to do some investigating and came to the realization that he was indeed dating susan. only it was not my susan. but i was involved in an organization with his susan, so that was just weird, because i don't think she had any idea that he still kept in contact with me. so i stopped responding and moved on. i wanted the story to end there.

susan and boat boy broke up. know how i know? because he started gchatting me and wanting to know why i never talked to him anymore. at this point, i messaged his roommate, who i think is actually a nice guy, and told him boat boy had hurt my feelings about the whole susan situation. i'm not sure what the roommate said to boat boy, but boat boy apologized. i don't like to hold grudges. he asked me out repeatedly for about 2 months before i said ok. he said a group of his friends were getting together for some drinks and would i please go with him. i'm not sure why i said ok. oh wait, i know why. because he is extremely good looking and i just can't say no to a doosh. in theory, i can, but in reality, they are charming. so i go, we have a good time, i think his roommate bought my glass of wine. i go home, he txts me, says he wants to hang out again that same week. i said i didn't know if i would have the time due to my hectic work schedule. plus, i don't know if i even liked him at this point.

the next day, he g-chats me and the convo turns to sex. yes, s-e-x. after a group date. i tell him i'm not sleeping with anyone until i get married. he spends about 25 minutes blasting me over gchat for what a dumb decision that is and how no one would put up with that. i told him i didn't think it really should matter and that he wouldn't be the first person to not hang out with me again because of this decision.

i wasn't surprised to not get a response from him. then i hear through the grapevine he moved home. then i go to delete him and turns out he's deleted me.

so when i see this article in the paper, i immediately think of him. thank god we're not facebook bffs anymore. only a tool would delete me from his friend list for not sleeping with him. i, on the other hand, delete people for MUCH better reasons.

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